Mom-iversary

Today is one of those days in which you hope for and pray for and long for.  For a long, long, long, long time.  Its a day that quite honestly- for a chunk of my life, I didn't think God had called me to.  Mother's Day.  That beautiful sunshine-y day in May filled with flowers and 'counting your blessings' and all things maternal.  But, for a lot of people it isn't that.  Its a day of fragile hearts, of longing prayers and hopes deferred.  For me, I spent a lot of years of adulthood in the 'longing prayers and hopes deferred' phase of celebrating Mother's Day.  Its always been a special day for our family you see... I was born on Mother's Day.  My mom, became a Mom on Mother's Day.  How perfect is that?  Of course it super special because I have an incredible Mom and two awesome Grandmas who have truly helped form me and make me who I am.  They are definitely part of the 'great Moms of all-time' club!  It was a club I longed to be a part of but, God had different plans as to when and how that would all come to be.

This would be me, back in the day... 

Today is a miracle.  But, how did we get here?  Five years ago, God and I were in the middle of some intense discussion on where my life was headed.  I was single, there were no qualified prospects on the horizon and the last one had left my heart a mess and my head confused.  I longed to be a wife and a mom.  But, that wasn't God's plan.  That summer and fall- God and I did a lot of discussing and arguing and 'figuring out'.  In the end, I can truly say I came to the realization that I was not called to get married and have babies.  I was called to teach and minister to my students and help with summer camps and have the flexibility to help family when needed.  That is where God needed me.  God calls us to where HE needs us most, you see.  And, really for the 1st time- I was good with that plan.  I learned the true meaning of the overly and often mis-quoted verse:

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

- Psalm 37:4

This verse doesn't mean "be strong in Christ and He will give you what you want".  But, that is how it is treated and viewed and used so often.  What it really means is-  if you are in-tuned to God's calling, He will whisper  (His)  most perfect desires into your heart to long and hope and pray for.

And, that is what God did in 2007 and into '08.  It was a year of re-alignment and new excitement for the path ahead.  Had you asked me 4 years ago if I planned to get married the answer would have been a very authentic and peaceful- no.  God's got other things ahead for me.  It was like that heart desire had been boxed up and put away.  I was done with it- not out of bitterness or anguish but that chapter of longing was over.

Oddly enough though... I felt like God had whispered into my heart what I called the '2010 Plan'.  God wasn't telling me to box up the 'motherhood' box yet however.  After much discussion- God and I decided to save up money, pay off bills and get as strong financially as possible so that on my 30th birthday (2010)- I would be better prepared to serve wherever he called.  Whether that be spending my summers doing mission work in an orphanage, helping within the foster care system or evaluate God's view of single parent adoption.  It didn't really make sense but it seemed like that was where God said I was headed.  Remember, I wasn't getting married.  That was for sure.  I just knew that I needed to start preparing for 2010- whatever God had in-store.  So, I did.  And, life was good and my heart was content.

God has a marvelous sense of humor though... you see, at the end of 2008 (about a year into the '2010 Plan') God sent an incredible man into my life.  To say I was cautiously confused by God's new twist in the road is a major understatement.  By February, I let my heart open up.  In March, I let God convince me this was 'the guy' and in April we got engaged.  8 weeks later- were were married!  WOW!!!  It really is a miracle God could get me from zero to married in just over 6 months.

To make a long story a little shorter... in the spring of 2010 God started whispering the call to adopt into both Wes' and my heart.  In the whirlwind of getting married and the hopes of starting a family soon... I kind of turned the volume down on God's 2010 Plan.  But, then God reminded me that "He knows the plans he has for you..."

On May 11th, 2010 (my 30th birthday) we had our 1st homestudy visit in the process of adopting.  I remember quietly thinking that day... wow, God- this is a version of the 2010 Plan, I never saw coming.  The calling to adopt which was first suggested by my husband. God had assembled all the pieces for HIS plan.  He sent an incredible godly man to be my husband.  He prepared us individually and jointly to finance an adoption.  He spoke the desire into our hearts.

Today, we're celebrating lots of blessings in our journey to become a family.  You see- a year ago today on May 13th, we  got 'THE CALL' from our social worker introducing us to this little 6 week old little boy.

He was precious in his pink sweatpants and furrowed brow.  Today, that little guy is home- running around and lovin' on us.  What a blessing he is to me and us!!  God had it all planned out just like this.  I never would have guessed just 'how' it would all come together.  Go God :)  Like the song goes, he really does have the whole world in His hands!

This morning, Wes gave me my 1st Mother's Day card at breakfast.  He had rigged it up so there was a little picture of Kaleb and I on the front cover- it was awesome!!  Kaleb was on my lap helping me when he pointed to me in the picture.  He then looked at me and smiled and giggled.  After looking at it a little more... he kissed the picture.  Ooooohhh, baby!  He is the most incredible blessing with the sweetest most loving heart a kid could ever have.  Today, we really are counting our blessings.  God has done great things- thank you, thank you, thank you!

Our first family picture!